How to make friends when you’re a grown-up

How to make friends when you’re a grown-up

Making friends at school was easy.

But once you’re all grown up, it gets way harder – especially if you’ve just moved to a new city.

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Thankfully, social science has figured out a few of the ways that adult friendships form.

In the 1950s, sociologists discovered three factors that are necessary for making friends:

    WHEN YOU’RE A GROWN-UP

Proximity

You should be near one another.

Unplanned Reactions

You run into each other even when you don’t schedule it.

Privacy

You’re in situations where you can confide in one another.

Adulthood provides few situations where all three are available, but there are ways to make that happen. NRIsConnect.com is only one app of its kind which helps you (NRIs) connect with other local nearby NRI ( Indians abroad ) with whom you can create and join sports groups, enjoy festival or picnic events, dinner or movie plans or general chit-chat about daily life. NRIsConnect.com helps you find and make new NRI friends in your town, city anywhere in the World. And if you are Single and looking for local Indian Desi Singles to Date then DesiSinglesApp.com is here to help with thousands of members from across the World.

GET OUT OF THE OFFICE

Open-office designs have become popular, but they get in the way of relationship building.

Susan Cain, author of “Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World That Can’t Stop Talking,” says open-office workers have fewer personal and confidential conversations with colleagues and are often socially distant, quick to anger, aggressive, and slow to help others.

BECOME A REGULAR AT YOUR FAVORITE SPOTS

The key is to spend time with the same people. People feel a preference for people or things simply because they are familiar.

If you run into the same people, again and again, you’ll grow comfortable with one another and start forming a bond.

GO OUT AND DO ACTIVITIES YOU LIKE

Whether it’s indoor climbing, yoga, or a spin class, leave your house and do an activity you’re crazy about.

Arrange your life in a way that puts you in the company of an ever-changing group of people that you’ll have time to 

MAKE PEOPLE FEEL LIKE THEY MATTER

Friends like to feel acknowledged and valued.

If you never ask your friends for favors, they don’t get the satisfaction of feeling needed by you.

GO OUT AND EAT WITH YOUR COLLEAGUES

When you’re no longer surrounded by people you sort of know, you can go beyond small talk and delve into the real stuff: the meaning of life, whether there’s a god, and whether you should drink whiskey neat or on the rocks.

EXCHANGE CONFIDENCES

 Small talk is boring and stifles relationships. Sustained, reciprocal, personal self-disclosure helps in the development of a close relationship. Be open and just a bit vulnerable.

HAVE RIDICULOUS SHARED EXPERIENCES

Do something out of your comfort zone with people you barely know or don’t know at all.

Whether it’s skydiving or going through Tough Mudder, it’ll be an experience to remember.

GET IN TOUCH WITH PEOPLE YOU USED TO KNOW

Social scientists call people we used to know “dormant ties.” These are people we have fallen out of touch with — we moved, changed jobs, got busy — dormant ties are fun to hang out with and can bring career opportunities.

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